Being honest

Ahhhhhh....I finally opened up to a few more people *waving! Hi ladies!* I'm nervous because I was so vulnerable to do that but I feel like I have to. I have so much pent up nerves that are just busting at the seams! Maybe I will get more advice...maybe more encouragement....maybe just a sense of relief that I can get through this with good friends. I really am very lucky for the people in my life. I have been making more of an effort to spend time with people who DO matter most. It's really the only way I can get through all this craziness.

Today was a better day...I cried only once. *woohooo* That is a huge accomplishment for me! I went to the acupuncturist who gave me words of encouragement. She told me not to be frustrated that the therapy hasn't worked yet. Eventually she said that everything will add up and align itself when it's suppose to happen *sigh* I hope so...it's not happening soon enough ;) It's really good for me to see her. She really listens and cares and wants me to be a Mom.

I've drank wine and coffee the past few days....it was very liberating! Almost sinful but I feel like I need to do this and take the break!

Hsien has still been my rock and super supportive through this whole thing. He is glad I am taking this break but also very encouraging. He counts my cycles more then me! Ha! Ha! Always asking me what day I am on ;) Ready set go! I think he still has faith that we can do this without help...I am glad one of us is optomistic! I just choose to be a realist about all of this. I hate to be skeptical but it's the only way to protect my feelings and emotions these days.

Thanks for reading tonight!