That is how i feel at times....just on t his crazy wild roller coaster that seems to never end. I am still in good spirits but as I draw closer to my follow up appt tomorrow...I am expecting the worst *sigh* This great thing can't happen to ME right?! Ugh....I guess I am trying not to set myself up for disappointment but at the same time, I need to stay positive and hopeful.
I finished up the last of the Menopur and tomorrow early about 7am I need to get a blood test done. At 2:30pm for our appt, I will have my blood results back and they will do the ultrasound. I can only hope and pray that everything comes back good and looks okay. Please God...let my body respond well to these fertility drugs! At our appt, we will know more about what happens next, when I start the progesterone and when about my IUI will be scheduled. I have a feeling either this coming weekend or Mon/Tues of next week. I don't know why I dread the outcome so much...but then again....what if I do get pregnant?! I can't wait to find out!
For some reason I seem to be seeing pregnant women EVERYWHERE! At the mall last night I think I counted 20...probably all younger then me too *bleh* I went to Babies R Us to buy 3 shower gifts...talk about torturous but I found myself wandering the store, pretending it was me I was buying for. Not sure if this healthy or not of me but I felt good for at least 30 minutes. Why can't it be me that I am buying for? It's always for everyone else. I swear when I do have a baby...my karma better kick in because I have been more then generous with the gift buying lately LOL! I also secretly look at maternity clothes and baby name books *sigh* Once again I am probably torturing myself but it makes me feel happy for a while...then reality sets in.
Hsien has still been my biggest supporter although he feels I obsess too much about this whole thing. I on the other hand, don't think I do. I don't believe I act any differently then anyone else would that wanted something so badly. It hasn't taken over my life or my job and I am not losing friends...so I think I am okay!
Please please please...let this appt tomorrow be a positive one. I need this right now soooo badly!!
I did and do the same. I have my baby shower invitations picked out, know what I want the nursery to look like etc. My husband worrys that I'm making myself crazy but it reminds me why we are doing this.good luck with your tests and everything!
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